Let's get drunk and be somebody

Here's a sure as fire way to piss off your student nurse:

Drive a vehicle while under the influence of not 1, but 3 brain-altering substances: barbituates, benzodiazepines, and marijuana, with other passengers in the car. Hit a snowbank, and knock yourself unconscious. (At least you wore your seltbelt?) Then, complain to your family member on the phone that you don't understand why the doctor is making you stay in the hospital because there's nothing wrong with you.

Seriously, people?